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Push to Fire Interview: The Beards
(John Beardman, Drums)

by Meghan Player

The Beards

The concept of The Beards is simple: A folk-rock band that exclusively perform songs about just one subject: Beards. Meghan Player spoke to John Beardman Jnr. about all things beards.

All your songs mention/talk about beards - are you ever worried that you will run out of beard related topics?
When we first started the band, we formed for one gig, so we didn't know how many beard-related songs we'd go on to write. We just recorded our third album, and we've explored the topic of beards from almost every angle. We've also written plenty of beard related songs that were deemed inadequate to aid the bearded cause. Sometimes I worry we'll run out of good topics but it hasn't happened yet.

Is it a hard topic/theme to keep writing about? Or is it a healthy challenge?
It's hard to constantly think of words that rhyme with 'beard' - that's honestly the most difficult part. Other than that, it's a healthy challenge. At the end of the day, our beards are our inspiration, so as long as there's a mirror nearby, we will be able to generate more beard-related ideas.

You've vowed to get at least 100 clean shaven men to convert to facial hair on the '100 Beards Tour' - What are your expectations? What has the response been like so far?
When we tell the audience that they need to grow beards, we mean it. My expectation is that they will do as they should and let their beard grow. It's only right. So far, nobody has come forward and committed to growing and keeping a beard, but I foresee that once we get on the road, our message will be received and understood.

What do you look forward to most about touring?
I'm looking forward to being with my bearded brothers, and performing to a sweaty bearded audience and glorifying the beard. But most of all, we want anyone who doubt's that beards are very good to come along so that we can heavily propagate to them.

How are you going to convince guys to commit to the facial hair?
Mainly though song, but also by generating an atmosphere of shame.

Do you have a favourite place to tour?
We love being on tour in general, but one place that sticks out as particularly special is Canberra. Some people say bad things about Canberra, but there's a really good beard scene there. Lots of beard growers and appreciators. We even have a contingent of Canberra fans who are in the Army! I like that they can't grow beards because of their job, but they know that we are right. I've asked them to defy their country and grow beards, but they're too loyal.

Has the folk rock genre always been the sound you were passionate about?
No not really, we just started writing songs about beards, and many of them gravitated into the 'totalitarian folk-rock' genre. But in general we vary up the musical style, because all the songs are about the same thing: Beards.

Was it always the bands intention to follow this particular concept of writing all your tracks about beards?
Yeah, but we thought our first gig was also our last gig. We didn't realise that people would be interested in a beard-based novelty band until we formed one! So we kept growing our beards and kept writing songs about beards. And that's how we've spent the last six years.

If you had to pick one of your songs that really defines the band and its personality, which would it be and why?
"No Beard No Good" because it's straight to the point. People without beards really do have a lot of explaining to do…


Many thanks to John for taking the time to answer our questions. Photo by Brock Elbank.